My body is nothing if i left no name!

Lands are not inherited by the dead, but should you live a life of care for your family, no one will treat you like garbage!

Someone said: Do we wonder why they always come back to penury after selling off their parents final resting place? A child that waits to sell off his parents property in other to flesh up is nothing but a huge disgrace.

I am yet to see any family whose parents treated their kids like commodity to give back not with same penny! I have no qualms with people choosing where they want to be buried or how but there is this simple truth "When fathers are Fathers, son will be Sons! Do the sons bear the sins of the fathers or not? Yes if they dont depart from it! Change must and should be, however lack of creativity and transformational views or grounds prevent change, they will hold the grounds that supports him or her. They say in every war someone has a hand in it. One has to be smart in navigating a field to achieve results without destroying the old architecture! 

They say do not throw away the baby with the basket! True, but if the baby wishes not to live the nest, nature has built it such that the parent must make their child fly. We often don't watch mother nature, we don't study her. There are certain traditions that must be removed from our culture that has lead to our doom.

How we treat the Living and the dead and how the process is managed.

How we treat kids and how respect is defined towards the elders.

It is a sin "danger" not to pass on knowledge that would allow your kids to grow, thats what true inheritance is. If i should say, i have seen many African parents hide their knowledge from their kids just so they dont become better than them would be an understatement. Yes it is hard to comprehend that a parent wouldn't want the success of their child but looking at the state of Africa one can't say our ancestors did want progress. If you look around you will see clear evidence of it. Our lands are grave yards. Yes let the kids show the anger by selling the lands they buried their parents in. Can you imagine living next to a grave? Waking up every mooring and sleeping off on it? That is what i call witch craft on behalf of ancestors. Our ancestors have cursed their own land and kids.

My body shall never touch the ground, i belong to the wind. I have left a will that my kids burn my body and spread it to the wind. Should anyone question my will and persecute my kids for my choice, will inherit my pain. I will not bound my kids to a property, it means nothing if i will rot in the soil anyway. We all understand spirituality and we should respect the will of every parent, and parents should respect their kids in return by not hanging them with the umbilical cord before they even started to breath.

The practical reason for burying our elders in their own compound is because they dont want to be abandoned and forgotten, probably very aware that they sowed the seed. What if your parent did nothing to put you on your feet? What have parents left their kids to do?

My father who is a Benin man never brought me up to look at what he has, he gave me wings and thought me how to fly from the nest. Today he is a man who lives in peace and his kids prosper. May God bless him to live a hundred years. I actually dont know what i would do if he passes away. I would love to keep him near me, so i could talk to him like i did when he was alive. Good traditions come from values that build you strong but what is there to do for those who never looked after their kids? I say burn it to hell, if while the parents were alive they didnt take care of you and this is what happens to those houses where you see siblings squabbling for property of their parents, just to sell it off.

If i have no respect for a person i wouldnt even say hello, thats me, who doesnt treat me well, i will not harm, but i wouldnt remember them, regardless of if you are an ancestor or not. Yes this is why kids abandon the memory of their ancestors. It has been recorded in the bible. Matthew 12:47 - Who is my brethren?

I have been a witness to a family where they made their first born serve all and none of the members of the family or siblings grew to be anything. My dad always said "a family that thinks of only what to put in their mouth never leave the dining table." Breading lazy bums, who in return turn to vultures hovering your yet to be cold body. How is it that Africa isnt seeing what it has done to itself? MY BODY IS NOTHING IF I LEFT NO NAME!!!

For me, no child should wait for inheritance, if you find a young man or woman do so they should be shamed. What if we had such disasters such as hurricanes and earthquakes would anyone have any hope to inherit? We africans have been blessed to live on a continent that has no disasters. BUT WE HAVE BECOME OUR OWN DISASTER!!!

One should be ashamed of even talking about inheritance they didn't earn, let it go to the wind. What a shame to see how brothers and sisters trample your name because they want a share of what they never worked for. A set of values should be established and it goes with this tune "if your father and you never built a name together you are lost to the land" boys will be fighting their fathers and fathers their boys and hope to grow? Never.

We have another culture in Africa where the young are kept to silence, not because they dont know but because they see what the elders try to hide. We have eroded our own land, yet we blame the white man. They hold their kids strong because they know that they are their future, at least a majority of them, which is why they are fighting for every liberty possible. BUT liberties have boundaries, same YES today becomes a down fall for tomorrow, one should be wise about what and when. If the youth today are not held up, your old age will be hell. I invest in my future "Kids and society" and my today "Myself and Society" are my reason to succeed but not sit and be a vulture on young heads.

Parenting skills are gone, i wonder, did we even have it?

We say the oldest child is the head, yet we dont build him up, we just give them the title. Has her Royal Majesty given the throne to her son? If he doesn't care about his ways he wouldnt get it, his child will get it. Not all kids inherit the blessings or the sins of their ancestors. What protects them are principles of sustenance.  Don't Judge a book by its cover. The son is not the father, not all apples fall from the tree. My kids may or would not have my strength because they are not me even if they grew up under me, every Prince must earn his right to leadership. story of (Pharaoh and Moses)

Yes the oldest child is all that, and must inherit the throne, but only when he is brought up to be responsible for his actions and manage the affairs of the young. The youngest are usually cheeky and get cheekier the younger they are, it is normal and may be. The oldest child is brought up to represent the family but seldom does he possess the skills of implementation because he was brought up to present face "BE NICE" while the youngest is told "BE KIND" instead of in reverse order except he cuts off the umbilical cord by instinct telling him he isnt strong enough to take leadership. For a child to achieve esteem isn't hard because his ego is often massaged, should he employ himself to achieve self actualisation then he would have greater strength.

The oldest is often berated in the process of upbringing, parenting skills suck. We make all mistakes on our first child and often easy on the second. The second child is smarter but only because he had learnt on where the oldest made mistakes and knows that he will get away with a slap on the wrist, what happens is the second now grows arrogant. The third child is always the perfect one because he is given the care, time, space and also learnt on his 2 brothers mistakes. I wonder if there was a sibling between Moses and Pharaoh? With what i think, if one is to lead, the young child may not be all that brave, hence the position is always given to the first because he shows that facade of bravery and his heart has been hardened by the poor rearing. We undermine the wisdom of nature and hence we do not see where our mistakes were made. The ancestors never passed on knowledge. All kids should be brought up as equals, and this is established when the parents don't see themselves as gods.

Look at the story of Joseph, he was envied by his brothers and sold just so that they dont feel inadequate. Our elders shut down the young because they get embarrassed. The meek inherit the earth; a great leader dosnt surround himself with people who are not smarter than him. A leader knows he is just as strong as the weakest link. I am the eldest in my family, i listen to my younger one’s; gathering their critique and forming a plan because they know better where the shoe hurts them. I was placed by birth to look after  them. We shouldn't be quick to rule out the older one, but as the young, understand where their weak points are, support to build, you can decide after where you want to take over, because you cant do it all alone. The pyramids are still standing where the towers fell. A general that announces war before he attacks gets shot, before he even gets to battle. The eldest may be abiding time to teach the brat a lesson. There are certain things you cant rush. Attitude blinds people, and ruins great plans.

Traditions favoured the times and are still favouring some. I know i wouldnt burry my father the way the benin people would to the literal or lateral context. In short do you think with my hot head they will get what they want? Just as the west is now fighting the strong hold of religion so would be with our traditions but we should be wise about which to and which not to. If i should exaggerate 99.9 percent of our populace is illiterate, uneducated about having principles and development process. A system has been put in place but it is only a ticking bomb, i am confident that it would change because sincerely when i was 22 and thinking just as i am now, everyone laughed at me. Now there is a new generation that is more exposed and change will happen if like minds rub and not arrogant. My dad will still burry his mum in her Husbands house, i wouldn't fight it for the sake of the generation of my grand mother, if there is a proposed plan of communication with time we will transform beliefs. In my dads case i know i will have to talk to him because i know he also has mentally dragged friends idiosyncrasies and trust me i let them know thats how i think of them. There are so many strings attached that certain things cant just up and go but should one hit the right spot, the ripple effects will manage all.

Have you ever played peables on water "Joseph"? Thats how i think CHANGE should be dealt with, watch the impact, create the ripple effect and you will find the transitions.